> Face ID works at greater angles, we are told in the video.

Gotta love TheVerge guys also doubting any claims Apple is doing.

Apparently, it's a "UI" chip.

... which is really weird. Does it store the whole Cocoa library inside it?

> Spec slide has "Apple-designed U1 chip" on it

Anyone wanna guess with "U" stands for? I mean, the first chip, "A" was for Apple, since it was the first chip; then it came "M", for "motion". Now... "U"?

> Video was shot and edited on an iPhone 11 Pro.

You know what? I'll only believe when they do this on stage. And I'd still doubt it.

> It shoots 9 images: four short images, four secondary images before you hit the shutter, then a long exposure when you hit the button, assembles a photo with added detail and low noise.

Uses all your battery, so you must really think when to use it.

> This is "computational photography mad science," says Phil.

Holy cow, "mad science"? Really?

> 4 high-efficiency cores that are powerful enough to use most of the time for great battery life.

That.... that doesn't make sense.

> "iPhone 11 Pro is the best machine learning platform in any smartphone," we are told.

Define "best".

> CPU can do 1 trillion operations per second.

Missing: pinky on lips.

"One. Trillion. Operations."

> Sri talking about machine learning and the A13 Bionic. Everything is faster for ML now.

I, for one, welcome our new ML overlords.

Ok, the bezel is mostly gone, but I can hardly call it "new design".

> "These are the most powerful and advanced iPhones ever in a stunning new design," says Cook. Brings "Phil" onstage to talk about them, first name only. But... he's Phil Schiller.

"New design" is the old design -- since iPhone 8 -- but 3 cameras.

> Cook says iPhone 11 was designed with "customers in mind" again.

I wonder which customers, as everyone who says something about iPhones says "more battery life".

(And no, 1 extra hour doesn't count.)

> iPhone 11 has 1 hour longer battery than iPhone XR.

Guys. Stop everything. One _extra_ hour of battery.

Your life will never be the same.

(Why the _fuck_ Apple is announcing this kind of shit?)

Also, _again_, a game with on-screen controls -- again, something that emulates another architecture on the current one. Apple should really screen those things.

> The game [demoed for the new CPU] is called Pascal's Wager, coming to the App Store next month. Notably, not Apple Arcade.

Ha! Caught you, Apple!

> Fastest CPU and GPU ever in a smartphone.

No no no, Apple. We do e-peen measuring with _memory_, not _CPU_.

> Apple is calling slow-mo selfies "slofies," so really, that is the thing they're trying.

INNOVATION!

BOOM! TWICE!

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